Movies I've watched

Gotta do reviews for

The Chaser
Pitch Perfect 3
Upstream Color
The Hateful Eight
Ride On

I'm awake

Thoughts are running riot. I had three puffs and these are the thoughts bugging me

(This one is problematic.)

To remember

Lilith - the corn on her foot. Bake cookies. Sort out school excursion TOMORROW

Bridgette - her sore stomach. Talk with her more.

Isaac - wrestle more. Prep for excursion

Theo - cook eggs and learn with him

Connect with all your kids more. They are here and are yours. 

I checked YouTube by the Alien Romulus full movie searches came up with Nada, except for a fake display for another film. Jade must've been lucky to see it before it was caught. Etc

My gay cowboy from Lance

confirm toolbox Monday 

Ask what's on people's minds

Ask if people can collect broken things when they see them because sometimes I am without a pallet transport

Plan to mark them and separate them

-Collect first

Telling myself I am worthless and building pictures of why isn't constructive

You are alive and your experience is yours

Why are you imagining encounters that haven't happened yet?

(Stop building your own walls)

I am unclear about what lightsaber training is, what aspects matter. I am handling other people's equipment.

-I get to be present

-What is it to you Adam? What is it to your family?

-Be prepared

-bE CLEAR

-Confirm status of current sabers

Talk to people. Understand more. Be responsible and commit to your decisions, including the ones you don't know. Especially when you don't know. Be open and aware.

Make sure to be on top of your duties! Remove the distractions! The ones that you KNOW are distracting you. YOU KNOW WHAT WE MEAN. CLOSE THE TABS!!!

Spend time every day sorting out the day!

People are around you every day. Be grateful you are still alive.

Could AP have been shoved by a different entity instead of the truck? Many drivers crossing lines.

Is my direct experience causality or correlation? Can I conflate my experience with the whole? The circles of self- local community?

Aaaaaaaand I just discovered Isaac's been watching kinky ASMR videos on this tablet. A lot!

 

Film: Pitch Perfect 2 (2015)

Thoughts: It's really better than the first. More laughs, more pace, fantastic music, great performances. Will be watching the third one soon, and I remember feeling let down by that one so let's see if the sequel is the best!

8/10

Film: Robot Dreams (2023)

 Thoughts: I had an old friend named Brice. We met in our early teens in high school, I'm fairly certain it was the first year of high school in Shailer Park, Brisbane. We bonded over nerd stuff, video games, books, anime and just generally each others company. He was an only child from a divorced family, living with his mother and rarely seeing his father. He was quite sardonic, rather sarcastic, and never afraid to speak his mind when he felt something was incorrect or when someone was being Contradictory. Generally this came out as a cynical statement of confusion at what the person was saying or doing call my delivered in a way that showed he didn't exactly know what to do to fix it but he was aware that it made no sense. As time wore on, his general grade Depression expanded, and although he had no trouble with the ladies, he had a lot of trouble accepting himself. I learned in our mid 20s to 30s that he developed a drinking problem, and he lived by himself while working in various writing professions.

Brice was a massive fan of animation. Video games and animation. I never got to the depth of what he probably was into, as we drifted apart over the years during my marriage and work and family commitments, however he always knew what the good stuff was and wasn't ashamed of liking what he did, and we shared a love of such things as Cartoon Network classics, unusual works like over the garden wall, and the more cartoonish works like Adventure Time. I did come to understand over the years that Brice would jump from obsession to obsession, diving into comics, then Japanese superheroes, then pro wrestling. I would meet up with him and he would be gushing about a particular hobby and then a year later I would meet up with him again and there would be a new hobby to gush about, whereas any mention of the previous hobby would be cast aside and spoken of with derision and disdain.

I mention Brice because not only does Robot Dreams feature a generally good natured but rather flighty self-defeating lead character stuck in a serious depressive funk, trying to connect with someone- anyone- emotionally, but also is built on the back of a fantastic soundtrack and an art style that I immediately felt he would greatly appreciate.

As mentioned, Dog is stuck in a frozen dinner, single player, apartment dwelling subsistence, watching late night commercials to pass the time, when suddenly he sees an advertisement for a robot companion. In short time, the build your own robot kit arrives, and after some heavy lifting and construction, Dog and the child-like, ever curious, eternally positive Robot happily venture out into 1980s New York City to experience the sights and sounds. Unfortunately a trip to the beach goes awry and Robot is stuck for an entire season in the sand, experiencing all the negative actions of a world that could care less for someone in need. Meanwhile, Dog’s attempts to rescue Robot from his stationary fate are met with roadblocks at every turn, and he resigns himself to attempting to rebuild his life while waiting for the weather to shift.

I was hoping this film would be dialogue free and it turns out it was, leaving me a happy camper since I am a sucker for a dialogue free visual experience. I'm a massive fan of the silent film era, and can thoroughly appreciate good editing and expressive performances to tell a story. I was concerned that robot dreams would have a hard time filling out the one hour and 43 minutes, however my fears were allayed as the credits rolled. The experience is an enjoyable and an emotional one, with a variety of characters and situations painted across the screen in true 1980s splendour. The animal cast a decked out in fluro lycra and roller skates, the beaches are jam packed with families sunning themselves, with humorous moments peppered throughout the runtime. There's a lot to love here, and altogether a worthwhile experience with Earth, Wind & Fire's fabulous September the backbone and bookend to the whole experience. Of particular note is the sequence with the birds and robot nesting together on the lonely beach, offering cute learning sequences and beautiful music. The character of Robot is the beautiful optimist against Dog’s mild self centeredness, however the nature of all our idiosyncrasies is what makes the film.

I'd say it's a good film to leave on in the background, with music or without. I wonder if Brice likes the film?

7/10

Film: Music

 Thoughts: I absolutely LOVED this film. Directed, written, story, produced and including music by Sia (with some help from Labrinth). Heartfelt, expressive performances coupled with thoughtful editing and sturdy cinematography result in a musical that now rates as my number one.

Zu (Kate Hudson), a free spirit estranged from her family, suddenly finds herself the sole guardian of her half-sister, Music (Maddie Ziegler), a teenager on the autism spectrum whose whole world order has been beautifully crafted by her late grandmother. The film soon challenges whether it is Zu or Music who has a better view of the world, and that love, trust, and being able to be there for each other is everything. (From imdb.com)

I cried five times. The whole thing got to me. I enjoyed the storyline and the dance sequences, appreciating and accepting that the entire enterprise is designed as a capsule of life, incorporating the big moments that shift us forward while the little details keep up the frame. Characters are painted with honesty and emotion, allowing the performances themselves to feed the drama with plot points as props to hang our messed-up humanity upon. Naturally, the dance sequences are key, and to me they do not disappoint, drawing my focus to the expressions and outfits of the performers.

The music is top tier, making me move and feel the rhythm of underlying context and overt lyricism. Emotion is the core, for a film called Music, and we are asked to make judgements while reserving our initial reactions to situations, statements and reactions.

I appreciated the colour, the sound, the editing especially, and the performances and how the whole thing made me feel. I look forward to watching it again with Bridgette this time!

8/10

Film: Venom: The Last Dance (2024)

Thoughts: Like with the previous two venom films, the franchise always seems to just fall short and not quite make it. The jokes are *just* not funny, the action is *just* not quite coherent, the story is *just* not quite interesting, the characters are *just* not quite deep. Venom: The Last Dance continues that standard and provides a fitting yet underwhelming end to the trilogy.

Eddie Brock is lost in the multiverse which is a good thing because he is a fugitive on the run after the events of Venom: Let There Be Carnage. Before I even finished the sentence however he is whisked back through a wormhole to his original Earth and immediately set upon by the practically unstoppable minions of a mysterious evil intergalactic Warlord called Knull (played by Andy Serkis!). What follows is a road trip across America with some asides featuring a laid-back traveling family and Chiwetel Elijofor and Juno Temple has military and scientists respectively at the now defunct Area 51. Things eventually lead to a climax where multiple symbiotes come into play and death follows.

I appreciate the hell out of Tom Hardy, and his performance through all the films is and continues to be a whole lot of resigned and frustrated fun. What I found interesting is that the film is directed by Kelly Marcel, the story is written by Hardy and Marcel, and they were both major producers on the film. Makes me think that there was a vision at work here and maybe I'm not catching what they're trying to put down, but looking at it purely for what it is, if this did not feature the character of venom, would I forgive the film? Would I forgive the trilogy? I don't think I'd even be interested.

In each film I feel a lack of investment in any one aspect of the production. The action is hard to track, more than a Transformers film, and generally lacks any real weight. The characters aim for dramatic moments but the overall effect isn't one of true connection. The humour which makes up a significant section of each film is frequently not funny and delivered in manners that don't quite match the material. This isn't a statement on what should or shouldn't be in a film but more so whether or not what is being presented actually works. There isn't really a punchline I suppose. I also found a real issue with this film in particular where I had trouble understanding the dialogue of many characters both human and symbiote alike. 

On the plus side it's fun, my kids like it and there are worse films out there. I genuinely don't feel like watching it again though 😂

5/10

Where I'm at

I started meditating about a week ago. I signed up for 4 day course, 770 bucks, and that's concession- health care card. I palm it off as a good thing, and it's helping. But I'm making dumb decisions with money; I MAKE dumb decisions with money. New TV, then ANOTHER 4K player to make it play what I want. Bought ANOTHER Xbox a month or two ago. Spent hundreds on new movies just last week. I buy snacks, and quick food options, sometimes alcohol. Dumb shit, unnecessary shit, filling holes I'm staring into, acknowledging them openly as I toss my meager earnings- SAVINGS- inside. Load up the fast credit facilities. I WAS debt free, then I bought the FIRST TV earlier this year (last year?) on credit. Then I found out I racked up 12K in Centrelink overpayments a year or two ago, after the divorce.

I haven't smoked weed in a while. The last batch, Jack Herer, really sets off my paranoia, so I've just gone off it. The alcohol has really slowed down too; wine gives me headaches now. Doesn't stop me. It's cheaper and hangs around for less time than a bottle of spirits!

Bought a synth keytar. I can see it gathering dust. Because I hate how the laptop isn't strong enough to handle the app for building music! I let myself get distracted by the minor things.

Beside all this, I feel ok. I feel fine! I am accepting I am a selfish, insensitive, financially unstable axxhole: it's who I am. What is fighting against what I am inside and outside? I do not feel the anxiety of this, and I am feeling less anxiety being this in public, with others. I am learning to accept I have very stunted personal assertive skills in social situations. This is the pain I have to live with: it is my pain. To fight it, lament it is to fail understanding that we all have pain. 

I love my kids, my family, despite my shortcomings and how who I am makes me come up short in all aspects of life. I am a boring, uninteresting, persistent machine of habit. I make a minimal fuss of myself. I make everything worse by being this way and yet I persist, I must. Changing myself by force just doesn't work.

All of the self reflection is a lie I'm feeding myself.